The Nemesis of Change

When will I ever learn?

How come I can't see it when I am in it?

I took a kid to a med check and mentioned that the ante was upped lately. Behavior changes, old patterns emerging, mood swings, all that good stuff that makes us remember that we are parenting attachment challenged kids.

My practitioner looked back through the records and said, "Huh, you said the same thing this time last year."

I did?

I also took a class last month: Caring for Children Who Have Experienced Trauma. Kids who have experienced trauma cyclically revisit their trauma. Multiple traumas? Lots of ups and downs. How do they know, when these things happened years ago? The length of the day, angle of the sun, time of year? Their bodies and brains just seem to know.

Any kid who was 1) removed from their birth parents and 2) placed with strangers has already got two trauma experiences on their resume. Never mind whatever precipitated the removals.

Back to the kid. I started naming the changes we had going on in December and January.

1) Change of season - schedule change/activity change
2) New bedroom
3) Weather changes - more clothes, hats, and mittens
4) People change - sending a sister home
5) Deciding to add a new brother
6) Date of original placement in our family
7) College sister home and then leaving again

Ok, that is a little bit of change.

Some major, some minor but still change to a child who is sensitive to anything different in their surroundings.

Once again, I am reminded of the need for structure for this child.

I try, but sometimes I run out of energy trying to keep life perpetually on track.

Then we all pay.

These kids have taught me that I still have much to learn.

I am a better person because of them.

I wouldn't have it any other way.

Thank you, God, for putting my life on the narrow path.